My Heads in a Jam...

My heads in a jam

cant take you off my mind

from the time we met

I’ve been beset

by thoughts of you

and the more that I ignore this feeling

the more I find myself believing

that I just have to see you again

I cant let you pass me by

Ii just cant let you go

but I am much too shy to let you know

afraid that I might say the wrong words

and displease you...

The Evening Before My Birthday And After…

Its a wonderful evening before my Birthday...
And also the hottest temp of the month...
Am not alone…
Am with my friends…
Toni and Balong (Marky) and Juliut
I even gave away Avril Lavigne concert tickets to ka-SUNCell…
And went to Pansul Laguna...
For MBPhils Overnight Summer Outing...
I really had a great time...
Wish you're there too...

with Toni, one of my closefriend @ Seattles Best MS... night before my Bday...


on my birthday (april fools day)... waiting for the food...


after brunchdine with Balong...


Balong and Me at oykoT2... free food coz its my birthday... hehehe


the free food...



Balong and Me @ ToyKingdom... bibili ng barbie... LOLZ


with Julius @ Red Ribbon... thanx for the Blackforest and Halohalo... hugs....


MBPhils Summer Outing venue... Pansul Laguna

Joel A, one of my closefriend... with Sonny @ the MBPhils Summer Outing in Pansul Laguna

with Justin @ MBPhils Summer Outing 2-3 April

Wet Afternoon...

It’s a cold rainy afternoon…
The wet earth brings scent of old images…
Staring through the window at the wind blowing trees…
As two hands slip inside of my shirt, gliding upwards…searching…
My eyes close… finger tips play on my nipples…
I hear the rain… as he caresses me from behind…
And lowers my pants…

I feel sleepy but he nibbles my neck…
His dark beautiful sad eyes begging…
His hands all over my body…
I cannot resist…
His lips caress my legs…
I open them…Wanting him…
His desire arouses mine, compliments me…

He made love to me…
Full of passion and his gravity attracts me with desire...
His sensual mouth kisses me…pulls me with desire…
I kiss him back…
His member grows between my trembling legs…
He wants me to touch him…
Take him in my trembling hands…

He made love with his tongue and lips…
His fingers…
I dreamt of this…
Those dark beautiful eyes penetrated me deeper still…
I lick him…his beautiful member…‘till it flows endlessly…
It slides down my face, my chest, my legs…
Into my stiffness...

His voice soft and sweet to my ears…
Soft manly legs crisscross mine…
Our sexes beat together…
Still moves my soul…
The fire is strong…
Everyday, every hour…
Always wanting…

Start Feeling Great Today!!!

EAT RIGHT.
Eating qualitative and nutritious food, in appropriate quantities at proper intervals is a Good Balance Diet. Try not to feast and don't eat fast. Skipping meals will disrupt your metabolism and just make you gain that weight back. Have small meals in short intervals always.
Better Eating, Better Living...
Build a Better Diet. Nutritionally speaking, there are no good foods or bad foods. When eaten in moderation, all foods can fit into your diet.
Pyramid Pointers...
Follow the proportions of the pyramid. The largest categories are grains, vegetables and fruits. Choose lower-fat options from the smaller milk and meat categories.

Size up recipes according to food groups. A burrito has ingredients from:

• grain group (tortilla)
• vegetable group (lettuce and tomato)
• meat group (ground meat or beans)
• dairy group (cheese)

Get Enough Sleep.
Eight hours of Beauty Sleep is essential to rejuvenating your skin. Don't let your face look tired and pale by making sure you never compromise the quality of your sleep.

Stimulate Your Body.
Have a 30-minute massage once a week to sore back, aching arms, tired feet and dry hands. This decreases stress hormones and helps you rejuvenate your system completely.

Adhere To A Routine That Fits You.
A good skin care regime is a case to case basis for all. Every skin is unique and it is very important to know your skin type. In addition to a skin care that suits your needs, truly beautiful skin comes as a result of adhering to a program of nutritious diet, pure water intake, regualr exercise and fresh air, adquate rest and sleep, and stress management.

source: nesvita & home giant

I Am In A Labyrinth...

I do not know where to go
the path i take
seems
endless
a wrong turn might lead
to a dead end
or worsemy death...
I do not even feel strength to carry on.

In a turn or two
i see a being
i follow through
i converse
give my full confidence and trust,
then night comes,
we commune...
We go intimate.


I am in a Labyrinth


We cover ourselves
with our own body
to protect from the cold
then again
at dawn
he is gone
i was left alone
with my dignity down

(ganyan talaga)

We are all in a labyrinth...
you don't know whom to trust

I want to get out
i want to get free
'tis my journey to surpass
the obstacles of life...

I am alone
i am in a labyrinth
When will i meet a co-loner
who wish to spend
all eternity with me...

When.............?

renegades51 2002-08-23 13:55:46

What if I say I love you....

If i had to count the ways I love you... the numbers would stretch around this world but never end.

If I had to speak or write to explain my love for you, my voice would grow hoarse trying, my hand become numb, and my mind frustrated with its inadequancies.

But one of the miracles of this love I have for you is that it needs no counting, no explanations, no play of eloquent words.

What counts is that you know it exists that it lives without explanation when we are apart, temporarily distracted or silent.

That when i say "I love you," it is sincere, straight from the heart and of the kind that will not end.

I wish that for one moment you could be me just so you could know how much..

I Love You..

CONSIDERING...

Considering...

All the possibilities

perhaps i would

go venture into

a foreign land

kaya lang,

i have to assess myself

do i really want this

or

Do i just want to escape

and hide?

Am I afraid to confront the issue?

The truth is

I am not sure of

what is going on in my life...

God's blessing to me

is now fading away...

(perhaps not)

kaya lang,

all is out of place.

I am in a rotten stage.

Life sucks,

as I picture it.

Advise...............

Renegades51 - 2002-09-12 11:56:45

Bukas Na Lang ...

Nung nasa elementary pa ko, di pa uso ang cellphone. Kahit nga telepono noon madalang. Kaya pag may kelangan kang kausapin ASAP, no choice ka, kelangan mong pumunta sa bahay niya. Kaya kami ni Alex, ganito kami noon: Monday, 5:00pm (sa harap ng bahay namin)

Ako: O, bakit?

Alex: Tatanong ko sana kung anong assignment natin sa Hekasi. Di kasi ako pumasok.

Ako: Lagi naman. Tara sa loob.

Nung nasa high school na ko, di pa rin uso ang cellphone. Kaya pag may gusto kang maka-usap ASAP, telepono ang gagamitin mo. Kaya kami ni Alex, ganito kami noon: Saturday, 10:30am (walang tigil sa pag-ring ang telepono)

Ako: Hello?

Alex: Kakagising mo lang?

Ako: Obvious ba?

Alex: Ligo na. Punta tayo SM, libre kita.

Ako: Ang aga-aga.

Alex: Sige na. 15 minutes andyan na ko. Bilisan mo ha.

Ako: Teka!

Baka akala niyo childhood sweetheart ko si Alex. Hindi. Childhood friends kami. As in baby pa lang magkakilala na kami. Pareho kami ng school nung Elementary, minsan magkaklase, minsan hindi pero laging magkasama. Nung High school na kami, pareho pa rin ng school. Magkaklase, pero hindi na madalas magkasama. Syempre ang kasama niya yung mga cute na magaling mag-basketball. Ako naman yung mga babaeng walang ginawa kundi mag-cr at magtsismisan. Pero pag uwian na, sabay kami lagi. Babalitaan ko siya tungkol sa crush niya, babalitaan niya rin ako tungkol sa mga crush kong kasama niya sa varsity. Habang tumatanda na kami, nagkaroon na kami ng kanya-kanyang barkada. Nagseryoso na ko sa pag-aaral ko, siya naman nag-concentrate din sa pagbabasketball. Pero oras pa din ang binibilang ng mga usapan namin sa telepono. Hindi kami mag-bestfriend (sabi ng girlfriend niyang sobrang selosa, siya lang ang bestfriend ni Alex), pero hindi rin kami simpleng magkaibigan. Hindi ko na inalam o nilinaw pa kung ano talaga kami, kahit na lagi niyang sinasabi sa ken na isa ako sa mga taong importante sa buhay niya. Madrama din yung lalaking yun. Nung college na ako, laganap na ang cellphone. Kaya pag may gusto kang maka-usap, pa-text-text ka na lang dyan. Minsan nga pati pag-compose ng message kinatatamaran pa. Kaya karamihan satin, pag gusto magparamdam sa isang kaibigan, magfo-forward na lang ng message na ginawa ng kung sinong walang magawa. Eto namang kaibigang pinadalhan ng forwarded na message ay sasagot din sa pamamagitan ng pagfo-forward din ng isa pang message. Wala nang personal na kahulugan. Wala nang damdamin. Paminsan madrama din ako. Ganon na kasi ang nangyari sa amin ni Alex ngayong college.

(May kung anong graphics muna) Juz hope dis HUG cud make up for ol d tyms I was supposd 2 txt u but wasn't able 2. GudPm! God Bless! Sender: MaU Sent: 17-Jan-2002 21:44:40

Sagot naman niya, "Il reach 4 ur hand n d cold of winter. Il reach 4 ur hand n d heat of summr. But f my short lyf cant reach d dawn of spring, I promise n heavn il reach u wid my wings. Sender: AleX Sent: 17-Jan-02 21:58:10

Si Alex talaga, paminsan corny.

Hanggang ganito na lang ang pag-uusap namin. Sinemento na ang kalsada mula sa bahay namin patungo sa kanilang lugar pero hindi na ulit ako nakadalaw sa kanila. Pati nga telepono namin halos hindi na nagri-ring. Nung bakasyon na, naisipan kong kamustahin siya. Napapadalas na kasi ang pagtext niya, hindi naman ako makasagot kasi walang load. Siguro break na naman sila nang girlfriend niyang selosa kaya naghahanap na naman ng female presence yung loko. Sabi ko pupunta ko sa kanila ng Sabado. Pero nag-Induction Ball ang org kaya di natuloy. Di bale, bukas na lang. Kaso, napuyat ako. Di na ko tumuloy sa kanila. Natulog lang ako maghapon. Sumunod na linggo, binalak kong tawagan siya. Kaso ang pinsan kong high school na-Super-Glue na yata sa telepono namin, di ako maka-singit. Natulog na ko, may bukas pa naman. Dumaan na ang maraming bukas (at isang milyong text message ni Alex) ay di ko pa rin siya nakausap o napupuntahan sa kanila. Sobrang init kasi, ayokong lumabas ng bahay. Isang umaga ng Sabado, sa mundo ng kabataang umiikot sa maliit na screen ng kanilang cellphone, nag-ring ang telepono namin. Malamang para sa pinsan ko yun, kaya tinawag ko. Eh naliligo pala. No choice ako.

Ako: Naliligo sya.

Alex: Ha?

Ako: Alex?

Alex: Anong sabi mo?

Ako: ALEX!!!

Alex: MAU!!! Buhay ka pa pala!

Ako: Oo naman.

Alex: Ligo ka na. Punta tayo SM, libre kita.

Ako: Ang aga-aga.

Alex: Sige na. 15 minutes andyan na ko. Bilisan mo ha.

Ako: Teka!

Kaya ayun. Kahit na ang init-init sumama din ako kay Alex. Wala kaming ginawa kundi kumain at magkwentuhan buong araw. Binalikan namin yung dating ginagawa namin. Dating buhay. Mga dating kaibigan, teacher, niligawan, nanligaw, kinabag nga yata ako sa kakatawa. Si Alex talaga kengkoy. Sa isang araw nayon, binalikan namin ang buong labing-walong taon namin dito sa mundo. Parang kami daw yung commercial ng Standard Electric fan, ikaw at ako marami nang pinagdaanan (tama ba?! Ah basta, yun na yun). Pagtapos non, nagsimula na ang summer classes ko. Balik na naman kami sa dati ni Alex. Halos walang communication. Binalak ko syang tawagan para kamustahin, pero laging may assignment o kaya may lakad. Bukas na lang. Bukas na lang. Di ko na mabilang kung ilang beses akong nagbalak at sinabing bukas na lang. Basta nalaman ko na lang, nung dumating na yung bukas na hinihintay ko, ubos na pala ang pagkakataon ko.

Isang umaga ng Sabado, sa mundo ng kabataang umiikot sa maliit na screen ng kanilang cellphone, nag-ring ang telepono namin. Kakagising ko lang kaya di ko muna pinansin. Inuna kong tiningnan ang cellphone ko at baka may message. Meron nga. Babasahin ko na sana kaso walang tigil sa pag-ring ang telepono. Nakakairita.

Ako: Hello?

Caller: Mau?

Ako: Yup. Sino to?

Caller: Si Anton. Wow. Kuya ni Alex. Gwapo yun. Bakit kaya?

Ako: O, Kuya Anton, napatawag ka?

Caller: Kasi Mau, ano kasi, si Alex...

Ako: Bakit? Magpapasama siya sa...

Caller: Hindi, nasagasaan siya. Mau, wala na si Alex.

Hindi ko alam kung natanggap ko na. Hindi ko alam kung kelan darating yung oras na maiisip ko si Alex ng hindi ako iiyak. Hindi ko alam kung hanggang kelan ko pagsisisihan ang mga pagkakataong sinabi kong bukas ko na lang siya kakausapin. Sya nga pala, yung nag-text bago tumawag si Kuya Anton, si Alex yun Nung gabi siya nagtext, nung gabi bago siya nawala. Yun ulit ang pinadala niya, pero iba na ang kahulugan sa kin. Il reach 4 ur hand n d cold of winter. Il reach 4 ur hand n d heat of summr. But f my short lyf cant reach d dawn of spring, I promis n heavn il reach u wid my wings. I hope he reaches me with his wings.

“Veni, Vidi, Vici! "
( I saw, I came, I conquer! )
*** from my old netfiles... contributed by cheese on Saturday, September 21, 2000 @ 02:01:27 PHT ***

ITS YOU THAT MAKES ME HAPPY

= Its You That Makes Me Happy =

You are my spring of content; and so long as I have you, and you too are happy, nothing but good and power can come to me... may God bless and keep you! I could not be what I am, if i did not take such serene happiness from my union with you...

To love is to place our happiness in the happiness of another...

I sit here lonely realizing that it's not people or places that make me happy... It's YOU...

Love, and love alone, is capable of giving thee a happier life.

Its Monday...And Am Late... :D

Everyday dito sa Escalator na ito ako bumababa papasok ng Opis...kunti lang tao... late na kasi ako... Pagmasdan mo itong mama sa unahan ko, kapit na kapit...muntik kasi sya nadulas... sayang di ko nakuhanan agad... nagmamadali kasi ang loko... akala nya parating na ang train sa side namin... eh sa kabilang side pala yong paparating na train...

"Life makes no guarantees as to what you'll have... It just gives you time to make choices an dto tkae chances and to discover whatever secrets that might come your way..." D.D.

Sa flatform ding ito ako nakatayo at nag aantay ng train araw araw... titingin-tingin, sa kaliwa, kanan, likot, harap...nagbabakasakaling meron ako kakilala na nag aantay din ng train... at syempre di maiwasang minsan may nakakangitian at nakakatitigan... na missed ko yong palagi kung nakaka sabay ngayon... sayang... late na kasi ako... at sa tagal ng train dumating, magiging sexy na yong girl sa kakaantay wala pa rin... hehehe

"If you are willing to take the opportunities you are given and utilize the abilities you have, you will constantly fill your life with special moments and unforgettable times." D.D.

Eto na yong train...salamat dumating din... ang tagal... tatlong train muna darating sa kabila bago dumating 'to. Hindi sya gaano masikip ngayon...pano late na nga kasi ako... di ko na rin makakasabay yong dati kung nakakasabay sa umaga... sayang nakakaganda at nakakapagpasaya pa naman sya ng buong araw... sana bukas kasabay ko ulit sya... sana hindi na ako late... :D

"No one knows the mysteries of life or its ultimate meaning, but for those who are willing to believe in their dreams and in themselves, life is a precious gift in which enything is posible." D.D.

I got this from my old files... dated 2000...

* * * *
Love Is Making Risks

When you think of your past love, you may view it as a failure. But when you find a new love, you view the past as a teacher. In the game of love, it doesn't really matter who won or who lost. What is important is you know when to hold on and when to let go! You know you really love someone when you want him or her to be happy, even if their happiness means that you're not part of it. Everything happens for the best. If the person you love doesn't love you back, don't be afraid to love someone else again, for you'll never know <>unless you give it a try. You'll never love a person you love unless you risk for love. Love strives in hurting. If you don't get hurt, you don't learn how to love. Love doesn't hurt all the time. Though the hurting is still there to test you, to help you grow. Don't find love, let love find you. That's why it's called falling in love because you don't force yourself to fall. You just fall. You cannot finish a book without closing its chapters. If you want to go on, then you have to leave the past as you turn the pages.

Love Is Making Risks...

Love is not destroyed by a single failure or won by a single caress. It is a lifetime venture in which we are always learning, discovering and growing.

The greatest irony of love is letting go when you need to hold on and holding on when you need to let go. We lose someone we love only when we are destined to find someone else who can love us even more than we can love ourselves. On falling out of love, take some time to heal and then get back on the horse. But don't ever make the same mistake of riding the same one that threw you the first time. To love is to risk rejection, to live is to risk dying, to hope is to risk failure. But risk must be taken because the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing! To reach for another is to risk involvement, to expose your feelings is to expose true self, to love is to risk not to be loved in return. How to define love: fall but do not stumble, be constant but not too persistent, share and never be unfair, understand and try not to demand, hurt but never keep the pain.

Love is like a knife. It can stab the heart or it can carve wonderful images into the soul that always last for a lifetime. Love is supposed to be the most wonderful feeling. It should inspire you and give you joy and strength. But sometimes the things that give you joy can also hurt you in the end. Loving people means giving them the freedom who they choose to be and where they choose to be. For all the heartaches and the tears, for gloomy days and fruitless years, you should give thanks, for you know, that there were the things that helped you grow. Loving someone means giving him the freedom to find his way, whether it leads towards you or away from you. Love is a painful risk to take but the risk must be taken no matter how scary or painful, for only then you'll experience the fullness of humanity and that is love. Only love can hurt your heart, fill you with desire and tear you apart. Only love can make you cry and only love knows why. If you're not ready to cry, if you're not ready to take the risk, if you're not ready to feel the pain, then you're not ready to fall in love. There was a time in our lives when we became afraid to fall in love 'coz every time we do, we get hurt, then I figured that's why it's called falling in love.

Nagpapacute Lang sa DigiCam, January 28 2005

At the Medical/Dental Mission RC PQUE-LAKAMBINI, January 17 2005

Unang Araw ng Pasok sa Opisina... Enero 5 2005 (Sepia)

Unang Araw ng Pasok sa Opisina, Enero 5, 2005...

Bowling Championship at the StarLane, December 18, 2004

Wala Lang... Malungkot Ako Eh...

Gusto ko tung kulay na to...
Masaya kasi ako pag itong kulay na to ang nakikita ko...
Nawawala ang lungkot ko pag itong kulay ang gamit ko...
'Di kagaya noong nakarang araw....
Bigla na lang bumalik ang mga alala...
Alaalang di naman dapat ng balikan...
Dahil tapos na at wala ka nang magagawa pa...
Bakit nga ba kasi ganun....
May magawa ka lang na isang mali...
Bigla nalang bumabalik lahat ng alaala ng mga nagawang pagkakamali...
Ikaw, kagaya ko rin ba?

Nakaupo lang ako ngayon sa harap ng computer, bored na bored...
Wala akong ganang makipagusap...
Ayaw ko ring mag chat... online sya kasi, eh ayaw naman nya ako kausap...
Dami tuloy akong iniisip... iniisip ko sya... ako kaya iniisip din nya?
Ang lungkot ng araw na 'to...
Ito na ata ang pinaka malungkot na araw sa buhay ko...
Para kasing kulang...
Di ko kasi alam kung totoo sya o kagaya ng iba na napadaan lang...
Akala mo ito na pero hindi pa pala sya...
Kung alam lang nya na hindi lang mga kaibigan, lugar o bagay
ang nakakapag pasaya sa akin....
Kundi siya...
Siya ang talagang nakakapagpasaya sa akin...

*________*_________*

Wala lang... gusto ko lang isulat 'to...
walang magawa eh... hindi ko rin alam kung tama ang pagkakagawa ko...
hindi naman kasi ako isang makata...
ahhhh!!! basta... kung mali, eh... di mali... tumawa ka na lang... kasi mukhang nakakatawa?
nililibang ko lang sarili ko eh... dahil talagang malungkot ako...
nakakainis kasi... nakakalungkot pa...